One day she . . .

In the past week,

I've been thinking about

the

edges.

The boundaries

that I come up to and look over

and then retreat back away from.

Life is continuously filled with these edges.

Doorways.

Thresholds open for the crossing.

Thoughts and ideas and plans and dreams

that

I

come right up to

and then back away.

And wonder

will I ever cross over?

A couple thoughts occurred to me as I was making things

the other day

and

I started to type up some

"One day"

statements.

What if "one day" was today?

I do believe this will

become part of one large piece

I will make to remind myself

to decide

to believe

to trust

to press

to cross

to be all in

to risk

to really live.

Putting my work, my pictures, my words out there

has been one flying leap of faith

after another.

It still takes courage.

It still opens my eyes to new places to stretch my wings,

to new butterflies flying in my stomach,

to new horizons to journey toward

with no guarantees

but lots

of

possibilities.

My Whole Heart

"We pour out our misery, God just hears a melody . . . "

Better Than a Hallelujah ~ Amy Grant.

This is me.

I give You

what I have to give.

My whole heart.

My searching.

My anger.

My desperation.

My complaints.

My crying.

My distress.

My shame.

My unforgiveness.

My anxieties.

My cares.

My worries.

My grief.

My doubt.

My brokenness.

My trust.

My joy.

My hope.

My boldness.

My timidity.

My faith.

My belief.

My love. 

My praise.

My song.

My victory.

My triumph.

My milestone.

My celebration.

My confidence.

My courage.

My worship.

My authentic heart.

Right now.

All of it.

Here it is.

This is me.

*

*

I am getting ready to start

Stepping Up: A Journey Through the Psalms of Ascent

by Beth Moore

with a group of ladies.

I picked up my book today.

You know I couldn't resist reading the first day!

To close the day's lesson,

Beth suggested that we could worship

in our emotions instead of pushing them aside to worship.

Then she suggested thumbing through the Psalms

and writing down some of the expressive words.

As I thumbed through,

the most common words I seemed to see were

"cry out".

It reminded me of Amy Grant's song quoted above and here:

"God loves a lullaby in a mother's tears in the dead of night

better than hallelujah sometimes . . .

God loves a drunkard's cry, a soldier's plea not to let him die

 . . . beautiful, the mess we are, the honest cries

of breaking hearts

are better than a hallelujah."

Which inspired me to write "my whole heart".

He wants our whole heart . . . all of it.

Not just the good image stuff.

All of it.

Living sacrifice.

*

Sharing some of my latest art.

A little hand-sized commissioned piece

with the theme verse from the women's retreat.

A surprise piece that I will unveil soon . . .

I just keep getting new ideas for it.

And the shadow box that I finished a month ago

for my sweet friend

to remember God's miracles.

*

*

Copyright 2011 ~ Jodene (Jodi) Shaw.



Established Hands & Guarded Hearts

Two new pieces I put together

over the past few days.

The first is inspired by

my prayer for

my husband. . .

He works hard as a rancher

here with his family.

Carrying on a legacy

of a great-grandfather

who immigrated from Ireland

over 100 years ago.

It is my prayer that the work of his hands

would be established

~ held up ~ strengthened ~ solidified

by the Lord.

Those of you that work

outside year-round in the weather

are familiar with the yellow chore gloves.

The way they smell when they are new.

The feel of them...

the warmth.

But also the cold

when they get wet.

And the smell of them

in the spring.

When the baby calves

are dropping into the snowbanks

and have to be brought in

on a calf sled

to the barn

or to a calf heater

or to a bathtub

to be saved.

In the middle of the afternoon

and

in the middle of the night

when the snow is blinding

or when

the mud is relentless.

The season will come soon enough.

And several pairs

of these yellow gloves

will be thrown away.

Before the season is finished.



And so I pray

that God would establish

the work of these hands

in these gloves.

Make the work firm,

long-lasting,

well-rewarded

fulfilling.

Established.



~

*

~

The second piece is a verse for me.

Reminding myself

that is ok

to protect my heart.

It is ok

to

have

boundaries.

It is ok to have a fence

with a gate.

It is ok to have walls

with doors and windows

to open and shut.

To welcome in

and to close for protection.

It is ok to protect that which is sacred.

And I hope

to teach

my kids

to establish

their

boundaries

and guard

those

especially

around

their

sacred

heart.

The part

of them

that is for

the few

that have proven

trustworthy

and

for themselves

and God.

When it is ok

to

open

and

when it is ok

to

shut.

Learning.

There is a time for both.

Copyright 2011 Jodene (Jodi) Shaw

Branching Out Art & Photography

Working On and Working Through

Leslie at her Words of Me Project blog

http://wordsofmeproject.blogspot.com/

is uniting women in a 31 day creativity challenge

to create every day for 31 days.

This is day 2.

Here is what I am working on creatively along with my "vision board" posted yesterday.

I've been wanting to incorporate my photos

into some collage pieces

like scrapbooking, but for the wall.

So this is my first attempt at that.

Planning to mount the photos on balsa wood,

distress the edges of the photos,

use some paintsticks,

and create a 3-D piece.

And this is what I am working through.

This morning I pulled weeds and I prayed while I pulled weeds.

Poured out my heart to God really.

That is what I taught my Sunday School kids day before yesterday:

"Trust in Him at all times, O people,

pour out your hearts to Him

for God is our refuge."

Psalms 62:8

And I am always amazed that whatever I teach,

is taught to me and is for me.

After taking my "flying lessons" e-course,

I am feeling very overwhelmed with what direction to take.

I am a wife & mom.  That is consistent.  I love that.  I choose that.

But...I have these things calling my heart outside of that realm...

and I am overwhelmed by what to put time, energy, and, yes, money into.

And...the looming factor of how can I make money with these things calling me.

How can they or should they be more than a hobby?

Is it possible?  Should I even be envisioning that?

Because...well...we all need money, don't we??

And which one do I pursue right now

with a 3 year old daughter,

and an 8 year old daughter and 10 year old son?

From White Owl, South Dakota,

60 miles from the nearest town with a bank and grocery store?

Can I really do something with this...

with a heart for writing, photography, art, counseling the hearts of women and girls,

teaching the Word? 

A heart for ALL of these things!

About an hour after the outpouring of my heart,

I am going about my dishes or something mundane like that

and this is what I see in my mind:

So I quickly draw the sketch

of what I saw in my mind.

I believe this is significant.

I believe that we are all created with unique purpose and giftings.

Because we need each other.

And I am being bold in sharing this . . .

but I think this is a picture of where I am going.

I don't know exactly HOW right now.

But I am looking for it.  I am researching it.  I am taking little steps in each area.

Looking for a way to weave them all together.

I know that when I taught Bible School to pre-teens & teens

and that when I worked with the girls team

preparing the hand mime skit for the women & girls retreat

that I had the opportunity weave all of those together,

and I come alive in it. 

It is hard work and heart work

and I love to do the work it takes.

So that is a clue to it.

I feel like I am on a treasure hunt

and the treasure is my life.

I believe this:

"For we are his masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus

for good works that God prepared long ago

to be our way of life."  Ephesians 2:10 {ISV}

I am His art.

With a purpose that is good.

{Wow! Is that ever humbling, when I let my mind linger there a bit?!}

I believe I am in this process.

I believe that all who have believed in Christ are in this process.

And it is not always easy.

But it is worth it.

*

I also re-visited this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rm_X4CNULCY

which is from Mars Hill Grad School in Seattle

{of all places}.

So, although I won't be uprooting and going to grad school in Seattle,

this video still resonates DEEP within my core.

The first time I watched it was about two years ago

when I was searching for works by Dan Allender whom John Eldredge had studied under.

{Anyone who knows me well, knows that I have read and often quote much of

John and Stasi Eldredge's books from Ransomed Heart Ministries

second only to the Word of God.}

And before the video was over,

my breath was taken away and I had tears streaming down my face.

It is a picture of other people who have weaved together

their faith with their interests and talents.

If they have done it, so can I.

THAT is what I am working through.

Photos and text copyright 2010 Jodene (Jodi) Shaw.